July 4, 2025 I'm not keeping this blog up to date anymore but the past year has had some significant events, which involve loss and tremendous pain, and a new bright light that has keeps me laughing and exhausted. Both 2024 and 2025 have been difficult years. With #70 coming up in 8 months, I am starting to really feel my age. I have been mostly homebound for the past two years (since July of 2023) when my second round of pretty horrific church abuse caused me to retreat. The end date of that period is just a week away and I hope to reclaim at least some of my life, and possibly move. It will depend on if there is ANYTHING by way of explanation, apology or regret for the five years of abuse I've endured (6 from a church in South Bend who I'm still legally entangled with) and two from the church I loved so much in Goshen, but all fell apart when one of the pastors there decided to contact a pathological liar in t...
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My story of complex PTSD following a stroke in 2016. My life crumbled and changed forever and my goal was to make it FIVE YEARS. I had just turned 60. I am now 65, eligible for Medicare and able to retire. Nothing in my life has been the same and a cross country move to escape the horrific rejection I experienced after my stroke was an attempt at a fresh start and a new life. Sadly, it did not happen that way. I have barely clung to life and five years later, have experienced so much that is surreal that I cannot expect anyone to believe my story. I cannot believe it myself. But I have to share it - even if no one ever reads it. And so this blog is born and will tell my story from May, 2016 to the present. I am still trying to find a way forward, still craving answers and safety and a new beginning. I am in a wonderful church now, but kn...